FF9: Seven Devils
by shannyfish
Summary: Oliver hardly sleeps and spends his nights at the Foundry...but one night, Felicity shows up... For SmoaknArrow's Olicity Flash Fiction Prompt #9: Sleepless Nights


_Holy water cannot help you now_

_Thousand armies couldn't keep me out_

_I don't want your money_

_I don't want your crown_

_See I've come to burn your kingdom down_

_"Seven Devils" ~ Florence & the Machine_

. . .

Oliver let out a scream as he shot up on the cot in the new Foundry, his heart was racing and he was trying to catch his breath. It was what he'd been calling 'home' lately. He was fairly sure that Diggle, Felicity, and even Roy would argue with him about using that term, but it was true. His childhood home had been taken away, the Queen Mansion no longer belonged to the Queen Family. He didn't have any other place. Well, that wasn't entirely true. He'd been offered couch-space at both Diggle and Felicity's places. Oliver didn't feel right intruding on Diggle, not with his and Lyla's news. He was happy for them and they deserved space. As for Felicity, things were just...they were confusing. At least, his feelings were confused. He loved her, but he didn't know how deep that love was...and whether he could risk his heart, hers, or her soul.

Plus, staying at the Foundry had its perks. If he woke up screaming from a nightmare, as he did all too often, then he wouldn't wake or worry anyone. He was fairly sure that the others were already worried enough about him. The last year had been a lot to cope with. He'd thought he'd lost everything, but he hadn't… He still had Thea, even if he didn't know where she was. He had Felicity and Diggle and even Roy. They were family, too. He hadn't lost who he was and he felt like he owed that mostly to Felicity and her continued unconditional support.

Oliver turned in the cot until his feet met the floor. He ran his hands over his face and continued to take deep breaths. He hated this. It was one thing to sleep so little, but another to be plagued by the nightmares he had.

Slade Wilson.

His once friend and blood brother had become the villain of his dreamscape. He couldn't shake it...him. Oliver knew that Slade was locked up on Lian Yu in ARGUS' Purgatory prison. All he could think was that none of them were safe, that Slade might still be able to act out his promises to him. That meant that the people he loved were in trouble.

Felicity.

Even if it had been an act for Slade, it hadn't been lies. He did love her and now Slade Wilson knew that. Felicity was even more so on the radar. He knew that if he voiced that concern that she'd remind him that it was still her life and it was her choice...and as much as he respected that, he wanted to keep her safe. He wanted to protect her and he wanted her to have a life that she deserved...Oliver just didn't think that he was capable of giving her that. It wasn't that he didn't have the money anymore, because he knew that that really didn't matter to her...it was that he didn't think that he could ever undo the target that he'd put on her. Why make it brighter? Worse? More dangerous?

In the latest set of nightmares, he'd be walking through the forest of Lian Yu and at first he'd be confused. He wouldn't know who he was looking for, but then he'd figure it out. He'd hear her screams. She'd call his name and then Slade's booming voice would fill his ears in that dream. It wasn't just Slade Wilson that he faced though, Oliver had many demons and they all kept him from sleeping at night...Slade just happened to be the bigger one at the moment. There was still technically a threat looming over them all.

Slade Wilson.

Shado.

Isabel Rochev.

Moira Queen.

Malcolm Merlyn.

Tommy Merlyn.

Yao Fei.

All of these demons were dead, except for Slade Wilson. Oliver knew that it was just his subconscious, but his subconscious had a way of making him feel horrible and filled with dread. Crime rates were down in the city and the Arrow wasn't so busy now, but that didn't keep him from considering how his actions affected those around him.

Felicity.

He let out a long sigh.

In the dream, after he'd hear her scream and Slade's voice, he'd start running in the direction that he assumed was the correct one. Yao Fei would step out and he wouldn't talk to him. Oliver didn't know why, but he'd block him. It was almost like he was testing him, all the while Felicity would be screaming. Tommy would appear once his frustrations were high and then suddenly Yao Fei would be gone. Oliver wasn't sure what Tommy's role was, whether he was supposed to be a distraction or supposed to guilt him… It was never clear to him, but somehow he always made it past him. Further into the forest, the Dark Archer would appear and they'd get into a fight before his hood would be removed and reveal Malcolm Merlyn.

It was like all these people that were dead in some way because of him were haunting him.

That was never it, though. It would get dark and so green. It would start to rain and then his mother's voice would echo throughout first, calling him. It was always the hardest part of facing all of his demons. She would be pleading with him and crying. His mother would want him to just stop...to disappear away and settle down. To give up being the Arrow...to hide from the world. The thing was, he knew that that wasn't what his mother would have wanted. As much guilt as he had over her death, she'd made it abundantly clear that her children meant everything to her...no matter all of her mistakes in life...and that she was proud of him...proud that he was the Arrow. Oliver had such a hard time leaving her. That was what was hardest, it wasn't listening to her tell him things that he knew weren't true...it was the actual fact that he almost had to say goodbye to her all over again. It was heart breaking. No matter her flaws...her mistakes, Oliver loved his mother.

The last three were sometimes individual and sometimes they were grouped together. Shado, Isabel, and Slade. Beyond them, he'd always find Felicity. It was always the same. She'd be propped up against a tree trunk and he'd think she was asleep, but she wasn't...she was gone. He'd check her for vitals and his hands would come away blood stained. No matter how quickly he made it through the obstacle course of those seven devils, she was always gone. He was always too slow.

"You're going to get sick."

He froze.

For a moment, Oliver was certain that he'd hallucinated. He looked up to see Felicity standing not too far from where he was. He was obviously losing his touch if he hadn't even heard her approaching… He was distracted, he knew, but that was no excuse.

"It's…" he started to say, confusion laced in his voice, as he looked down at his wrist. "Three-sixteen."

"This is about the time you normally wake up…" she told him as she took a step closer. Felicity tilted her head to the side with a smile. "Unless, of course, you go to sleep at three...and then it's later...but you never sleep a good solid chunk of time…" She paused for a moment. "Also, I checked your fitbit," she said as she motioned to his wrist.

Oliver suddenly remembered that Felicity had told him that it recorded his sleep activity. The only reason that he was wearing it was because he and Diggle were having a competition and Felicity had somehow convinced them that wearing these things all the time would prove that it had been fair the whole time. He suddenly wasn't sure that her motives were completely based on keeping their little competition fair.

"Are you stalking me through this thing?" he asked. Oliver was still confused. It wasn't like Felicity didn't know where he'd be and it wasn't like his lack of sleeping wasn't common knowledge.

"No," Felicity said quickly. "Well, I mean...I saw you were up...and I was up, so I decided to come and check on you…"

"Check on me?"

Felicity shrugged. "Normal people don't sleep an hour or so."

"I'm fairly sure that it's already been established that I'm not like normal people."

"There is...that."

Oliver smiled. This was an unexpected surprise, but he'd tried so hard these last few months after Slade's initial capture to keep her at arm's distance. He'd purposely made it so that the two of them were never alone. Diggle was usually always there, but sometimes it was Roy. It was never the two of them. Oliver knew it was stupid, but he wasn't sure that he could trust himself...not without a buffer. Diggle always made him think twice about things and he'd always tell him how things were, even if he didn't like what Diggle was saying.

"You should be sleeping."

Felicity shrugged. "My tablet sort of crashed… I might have eaten a whole pint of ice cream as I restored it. Though, it's not completely done...I just got too antsy watching the progress bar."

"And so...you're killing time?"

"Pretty much."

Oliver nodded slowly. "i was just going to-"

"Sharpen arrows?"

That was what he'd been doing lately.

"We have enough," she told him.

"Well, I could-"

"Work out? Because you don't do that enough…"

Oliver smirked.

"Not that I don't mind watching! I mean, please! Don't let me stop you from keeping yourself in shape or anything," she rambled. "I just thought...there has to be something beyond these walls that could interest you."

"The city's pretty much closed," Oliver pointed out and motioned to the time on his wrist. "Not sure what else I could be doing...unless you mean patrolling… It's been quiet."

"There's a coffee shop."

"I think coffee is the last thing I need."

"They have tea, too…" she said quickly. Felicity sighed. "Don't make me go alone…"

"You came all the way down here to check on me...and then guilt me into coming to the coffee shop with you?" he asked slowly and couldn't help but smile. She was so adorable and no amount of wanting to keep his distance from her could change that. Honestly, it wouldn't kill him to leave the Foundry in clothes that weren't green or made of leather.

"I figured that if I called you on the phone that you'd tell me to go back to bed or something…"

"I would have," he confirmed.

"But I'm already here…"

Oliver shook his head. "Okay," he conceded.

"Are you sure?"

"Am...I...sure?" he asked confused. Hadn't Felicity just gotten what she'd wanted? He was going to leave the Foundry to go to the coffee shop with her to have tea. It wasn't like he had a valid reason why that couldn't happen and as she'd pointed out, there was no arrow sharpening or working out that absolutely needed to be done at that moment.

Felicity shrugged. "You seem to have been finding every opportunity to avoid me for...months."

"Avoid you? I see you everyday," he pointed out.

"Maybe not avoid, but it feels like it...even though I see you...it's just not the same as how things were before," Felicity told him. "And if it's because of something I've said or done, then I take it back...whatever it is… I just miss you."

Oliver stared at her, his mouth dropped open slightly. His eyebrows furrowed as his heart clenched a bit at her words. He had tried so hard to make his action seem normal that he hadn't even considered that it was coming across as some other way to Felicity. Normally, it was something that Felicity or Diggle would say, but Diggle had been so busy and Felicity...apparently she felt like he was pushing her away.

Maybe he was.

"I didn't mean to…"

"I know it's been hard for you-"

"I did it because I'm scared," he blurted out as he stared at her. She had to know the truth. He owed her that. Her smile dropped and she looked concerned and maybe even sad. He hated seeing her like that. Oliver thrived on Felicity's smile and her wit.

"Scared?" she asked.

Oliver was certain that she knew that he wasn't someone who wasn't afraid of anything. He was afraid everyday. He just tried to hide it. "Of what could happen to the people I love…" He paused. "Of what could happen to you…"

"Haven't we covered this?" she asked. "It's my-"

"Choice, I know," he finished quickly. "That doesn't make it easier…"

"I'm scared a lot, but you know how I get through it?"

"How?"

She was quiet and didn't respond right away. Felicity looked down for a moment and seemed slightly reluctant to actually share her answer. Her head lifted and she looked back at him. "Because of you… I know that no matter what, that we'll get through it together."

"I'm lucky to have you in my life," Oliver told her as he stared at her. His voice was low and as much as he knew that. He wanted her to know that. She beamed a bit at his statement and looked down for a moment before looking back up at him.

"Come on, let's get you out of here," she told him and held out her arm to him.

He took it and folded it into his. They walked out side by side and he took hold of her hand. She squeezed it and he realized that she was right there...she was probably the realest thing in his life and he'd been pushing her away. He couldn't do that. He needed her in his life. Slade Wilson and the other demons that haunted him...they weren't really a threat...and if they became one later...then they'd be ready.

"Did I ever tell you why I was on Lian Yu...I mean after Hong Kong?"

. . .

The End.


End file.
